Tuesday, November 7, 2017

ITALY- Getting There, That Villa, and- The Wedding!

The whole Italian Story:
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Does anyone remember that one time we went to Italy? Because it's been a month and I haven't had time to catch my breath. But finally! I am here to tell the tale. 
(Important to know: We went to Italy for Buck's brother's wedding. It was in Florence. We left Rose behind with my aunt because I had just ended nursing and it felt right because the travel was going to be extra hard on her at her age (and therefore extra hard on us!) My cousin Molly also came along to watch the girls a few times for us during wedding festivities so we could enjoy it more.we called her our "nanny" to sound fancy.)

And now I shall start at the very beginning.
Travel. Airports. The hustle and bustle, in and out, back and forth. Sun rise, sunset. Train, train, taxi.

And finally- the VILLA. That Italian villa! It was the villa everyone was staying at and where the wedding was to be. Buck, the girls, my cousin Molly, and I only stayed there a couple nights and then moved to a bigger and much cheaper apartment.


I'm so glad we got to stay a couple nights at the villa. It was stunning! I can't even begin to describe all the details. It was built in the 17th century on acres of land on the outskirts of Florence with the emerald Tuscan hills rolling out behind it, dotted with golden homes and vineyards. The lobby is furnished with lush and ornate couches and hand crafted tables. Golden lamps, a piano and green plants surrounded those. The ceiling was low and intimate and paneled with painted glass tiles of grapes vines and oranges. On the walls hung large paintings encircles in carved frames, while nearby small pedestals cradled Venetian vases painted in dark, dreamy blues and greens. Out past the lobby there was a room made up entirely of windows and it was filled with tables and chairs where you could eat and look out on the citrus and olive trees, the arch ways tangled in vines, the stone paths meandering around fountains, the perfectly trimmed hedge maze, and past all of that, a sparkling blue pool.

Our room was in the main building with the lobby. Our room was small but lovely. Old art and vases complimented the arched ceiling of wooden beams. The bathroom was an endless canvas of marble. On the other side of a small courtyard was the other building- the oldest one, and that is where the really expensive rooms are. There is also a hidden tunnel that goes between the two buildings. In that tunnel there is a bar, a wine cellar, couches, more art, and a bunch of creepy statue heads that have got to be haunted.

In the expensive rooms, okay. Oh man. The front lobbies there are two story ceilings painted powered pink and sky blue and frosted with intricate white moldings from top to bottom. So much art, so fancy fancy seats to sit your rump on. There's also a closet of towels and a hidden spiral stair case and then a secret little tiny room that is a church. Ben and Lauren's room was massive and had a massive sitting room and a four poster bed draped with sheer linens.


So, wedding things! The night before the wedding we had a fancy four course meal with the immediate families. No complaints there.

The next day was the big day! They had their ceremony in front of the villa. There was a cellist and violinist playing music. Every one was beautiful. The wedding party walked down the gravel path first. Then June and Hazel got to be the flower girls. June was very proper and official about her flower tossing. Hazel dumped her basket in one motion and then sheepishly walked the rest of the way hugging her empty basket. It was funny and cute. Then Lauren came walking and she truly looked STUNNING. Some brides it's like, meh, but Lauren? She was a work of art! And I'm still dying a little bit that I don't have any photos of it because I wasn't the photographer. Eek!

I had other duties to attend to that kept me away from my camera.
I was the wedding officiant! 
Yes, somehow I got asked to marry Ben and Lauren! haha! 
So now I can say that I've officiated a wedding in Italy!
I did the best I could... I tried to look nice and professional and write a nice thing. I hope it was good...? 

I had to tag team it with some official Italian guy who had to do the legal stuff. So he welcomed everyone but then I had everyone be seated. And then I said something to this effect, more or less:

A big thank you to everyone here today! You have traveled far!
Ben and Lauren- look out on the people who love you so much and are here for you! 

Ben is my bro in law- it’s hard to remember a specific first day of meeting Ben is someone I can always laugh with or be sassy with. When I first met Lauren we could tell she was gold and begged Ben not to mess things up! ;) She was better than anyone we ever could have dreamed up for Ben. Lauren has softened Ben and refined him. Ben has given Lauren courage and a safe place. 

Renaissance means “rebirth” or “reawakening.” And Florence is the birth place of the renaissance.

Much like this city- today you both have a rebirth together. 

This day is HUGE. Many in the world may tell you it’s a silly social construct that no longer needs to be around, that it’s a burden and unnecessary. So why do we do this? Is it just because we are mindless sheep following tradition? Is it just for the tax benefits? Just so we can wear fancy clothes for a day and eat cake? 

No 
It’s for the promise of it all. It’s not just symbolic but THE moment when you say “yes. This is it for me. You are my everything. Let’s do this growing old together thing!” Today you promise that through it all and despite it all, you’re going to stick it through. That nothing else will ever be more important than each other. Not money, not careers, not another hot body, no quarrel, no pleasure will ever take the place of your love. So today the greatest importance isn’t even so much about making it legal- today is all about this promise! And we are all here because this love is something worth celebrating. 

And you guys. Here’s the thing. Too many times people claim to “fall out of love.” So I’m here to break the news to you. There is no such thing. You’re both going to change through the years. A lot. But if you stick together, laugh through it, talk through it, cry and fight TOGETHER through it then you will change for the better. And you will change together. And you’ll find that though you’ve changed, really you’ve just become your best self. 
Either you change together or grow apart. 

Allow each other to make those changes. Give your hearts space for that. Growing and changing together isn’t clean cut. It can be messy and mistakes will be made. Forgive each other. 

It’s a lot like a growing plant.  If you want that plant to grow you can’t simply pull on it, thinking that will cause the growth. No, that will pull it out and uproot it. You can’t force things to grow on your own timetable and in your way. If you want to help a plant grow- you give it sunlight, you give it water. And if you want to pull anything- pull out the weeds that threaten it. And so it is with your love, and for each of you. You will never be able to force each other, that’s useless and dangerous. Instead focus on taking care of each other- show love, give warmth, and when you want to pull something out- get rid of those noxious habits, people, and any other thing that threatens to take over what’s most important. 

Marriage is some parts romance and kissy- kissy smootchy smootchy but it’s also being cleaners, business partners, cookers, budgeters, warriors, counselors, listeners, and snuggle up in bed after long day-ers. (And hopefully one day “parents.”) 

And always remember this: that love is a choice. And it’s a choice you need to make everyday. Love is a verb. It’s a constant action you decide to make. Love does not act upon you, you act upon it. So really, if you don’t want to- you’ll never “fall out of love.” 

But, on the other hand- there are somethings I hope never change. I hope you both keep giving each other epic presents and surprises (even if neither of you can wait for the actually birthday or holiday.) keep loving all the puppies together. Keep laughing. Keep forgiving. Keep reading books and relaxing together. Ben, keep telling Lauren about your fear of outer space. Lauren, keep insisting on getting a grumpy cat to add to the family. 


To end I'd like to read the lyrics to your wedding song, which fit you so perfectly:

Song lyrics 
Looks like you got me where you want me
So go ahead and roll up your web
The best things in life are hard to come by
But sometimes the best things come from accidents

When days are dark darling remember
My love for you won't go away

You have a beauty like no other
A confidence that brings me fear
If I compare myself too long I might just run away
But you have a grace that keeps me here

Is it just me, Am I seeing things?
Or does the way we breathe make perfect sense?
I could start fires with what I feel for you
The sun could fade out and we'd see it through

The sun could fade out and you’ll see it through.
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Then he read some legal articles and had them say their "I do's." Then I had them do their vows and exchange rings, which I just made up as I went and Ben and Lauren laughed. And then Italian guy pronounced them married and had them kiss and then I said, "Presenting Mr and Mrs Harrison!" and that was that. BOOM.
  
And now a few photos that I DO have. 

After the ceremony, my cousin Molly, I mean, er, our nanny, took the girls back to the apartment and we enjoyed the evening being grown ups and having another four course meal with all the wedding guests. It was beautiful in every way and we are so grateful to have been there and to have Lauren in our family!!! 
Congratulations Ben and Lauren!

4 comments:

Shellie said...

That was the best thing ever! Wish I could have fit in your pocket to see it all in person. Love the pictures, feel free to post more!

Max and Rebecca said...

Well, this is absolutely incredible! I just kept thinking...is this real life? I love the description of your little flower girls. And your words on marriage were amazing! I started reading this post on my phone but stopped to do it on the computer so I could get the full effect of the Italy photos! Totally worth it, but now it is super late and I must wait until tomorrow for your next post.

Dayna said...

I could totally picture you officiating. Lovely words, good humor. Beautiful adventure.

Lillybet said...

Love the pictures and the descriptions but most of all I loved your wedding advice. The counsel is timeless and inspired and is a good reminder of what's most importance.