Getaway- Zion National Park

Last weekend Buck and I raged down to Cedar City for the first official event for our new non profit. Since it was a few hours south, we decided to make a little getaway out of it. Thank you to Buck's parents for hanging out with our girls so we could do this! 

After the event we left and drove further south and the rocks and canyons grew redder and larger, swelling in the sun. We stayed at a little guest house/bed and breakfast in the small town of Toquerville. It was perfect! It was clean and new and nice but surrounded by views of red rocks and mountains.

We checked in and then went to dinner at the Stagecoach and the food was amazing. It was expensive but worth it. And while I hate spending a lot of money on dinner, I love it when Buck gets all romantic and says, “Don't worry about money, we are on a date.”

After we ate we were so stuffed. We drove in Zion National Park and looked around a bit but the sun was going down and we decided we were tired so we went back to the bed and breakfast instead.

Can you see the clown face in these clouds?

We went to bed early and therefore I woke up early. But the sunrise was velvety and crushed with lilacs.

Once Buck was awake, we went into the main house for our customized breakfast. The lady that lives there and owns the inn was super friendly. She made a fresh apple cinnamon chutney for my pancakes and poured a layer of Vermont syrup over them. Then she had to leave to get some strawberries from her bushes before the chipmunks did. Sometimes I still wish I had that kind of small town life.

Then we headed into Zion again. I was bummed because we couldn't hike Angels Landing like I had planned. We found out it was going to take several hours and we didn't have that time.

  But we decided on a “moderate” hike that was only an hour and a half. It was beautiful. It wound around the sandy rocks and red dirt. The views were unearthly. Zion is truly a wonder of this world! I can't believe it is in our state! There was cotton floating in the air, in the distance you could see the jagged teeth of rocks mangled across the backs of mountains. A green river was a few stories below our path, green trees dressing up it's windy course. We took our time on the small hike, Buck letting me stop to take photos.

Mostly the whole weekend was relaxing with Buck. I missed the girls but being alone with him is always priceless. We didn't talk and talk about life like we sometimes do on road trips. We were more quiet and if not then we were joking and laughing and being weird and silly. We needed that. And at that point, I just wanted to keep going and hiking with him.

Photographer problems: Strangers don't know how to use my camera and we are usually out of focus. haha

And now, one last random thing. Before the hike we got two little animal finger puppets at the gift shop and decided to take them around and take their photos everywhere to show the girls their new gift that way. It was fun finding places together.

And now? I NEED to go back and hike more hikes and get to the top of Angel's Landing once again!

Your Light International- The Story of Our New Non-Profit

(Sorry, this is long, but I wanted it documented even if nobody reads it. If nothing else, check out our new website! http://www.yourlightinternational.org/)

A little over a year ago I was at the end of my rope of a long identity crisis as a photographer. A crisis I had known before but this time I really felt that I needed to find the path that was most important to me. This was hard because I am surrounded in a world of self proclaimed photographers. It seems that everyone has a "nice camera" and can take a good shoot. What's more is that I am apart of a facebook group of over 900 photographers who are all mostly in freaking Utah! And most of them are good at what they do! But I felt a lot of anxiety when I thought about competing in that world. It didn't excite me, push me, make me want to grow. It turned me off. And I noticed that a lot of photographers' work was starting to all look the same as everyone tried to fit the most recent trends in locations and Photoshop actions. 

And while I do love taking family/baby/kid/senior/wedding/engagement photos I found a lot of dread in the thought of reaching out to and dealing with strangers. Also, I take it pretty hard when a client receives their photos- works of ART that I spent hours on- only to have them email me back, a week later, with a "thanks." Sure, the money I make is nice but I would much rather trade that for true gratitude and appreciation for the art.

I realized I wanted to take photos for people that would truly care and appreciate it. So I asked myself, "Who would care?" And the first people who came to my mind were my beloved Armenians. In Armenia people have some albums of old photos and blurry snap shots from film. But that is it. When a family member dies, it is tradition to have their passport photo, a blue tinted mug shot of a straight, non smiling face, enlarged and hung on the wall. Yet Armenians love to have their photos taken. When they would see that missionaries had little digital cameras, they would want us to do whole photo shoots with them! I wondered what they would think to have a beautiful and professional family portrait hanging on their walls. The thought excited me. 

And with that, it was in my head. I wanted to give family portraits to those in need, who didn't have the opportunity. I felt the artistic need take the back seat and the need to preserve families and cultures overwhelmed my heart. And I thought, "I'm going to start a non profit one day for this." So I started to think it through and do research. 

First, I brainstormed a ton of ideas with Buck and close family and friends. Was a non profit for family photos really worth it? Would others find value? It was not saving lives with food, shelter, or water. Isn't that what matters most? I've always wanted to be in the non profit world, that's why I switched my major from photography during college and instead graduated in sociology. So was photography where I really wanted to go with that? What about genocides, slavery, children, refugees? Huge issues! I thought about bigger ideas like saving family members who were missing and THEN taking a family photo. (haha. A nice idea sure, but kind of impossible.)

But I remembered once a church lesson given and the speaker talked about trying to lift a heavy table or piano or something and how if one person tried to move all around and lift everywhere at once then they would be unsuccessful. But if together we take a spot and then lift where we stand then we can lift and move heavy things. And I realized that I stood there as a photographer. And that was where I could lift.

So then the research. Was this something that was already out there and over saturated? Was there a need? Could I help fill it? And as I searched I found organizations that gave photos for families with terminally ill children, photos for still births, some things like that. But nothing really for what I envisioned, except one. I found Help Portrait, a global movement that happened once a year in December where photographers and make up artists come together to provide family photos for anyone. So I researched them further and found a chapter in Salt Lake. I reached out but I didn't hear back for a while. 

A couple months later I was contacted by someone in Provo who saw my post on their site, a Help Portrait volunteer asking me if I was interested in helping with a new event in Utah County. Yes! Of course! I leaped at the opportunity. She said they were having a mini event that August and that I need studio equipment. I said I would be there but I in the back of my mind I didn't know what I was going to do since I didn't have studio stuff or really know how to use it. In fact, my studio light class in college was part of the reason I wanted out of photography! haha! But I found someone who let me borrow their lights and I showed up. Super unprepared. 

There I met Becca, the girl who I had spoken with, and Chris, the guy who had been volunteering for 6 years for Help Portrait and running the Utah events. He was also a great studio photographer. And he discovered that I had no idea what I was doing. But he didn't roll his eyes, instead he got straight to work teaching and helping me, encouraging me. Making me feel like it was possible. In the end that day I only did a few people's photos because the lights I had were super cheap and weak. But I felt something powerful surge through me. It felt like one of the most important days of my life and like I had met some people I was always suppose to meet. On the drive home I cried and cried and prayed, thanking God for the peace and rightness that I felt, even though I didn't know all the reasons why.

Long story short, Becca had some things come up and asked me if I wanted to take over and be the coordinator for the new chapter in our county. Little did she know that was exactly what I wanted. I wanted to learn this whole process and be on the inside. Meanwhile I went to a non-profit conference in Salt Lake. It's a whole other story in and of itself, but I learned a ton of huge things and met up with important contacts. I bought professional studio equipment, which was not cheap. Buck is so amazing to support me in this as we didn't know quite where it would all lead. Through the planning and everything Chris taught Buck and me how to use the lights with his own free time. We also met a few times to discuss how to run the event. He took me to a community outreach meeting where he presented on Help portrait. During these times Chris confided in me that he always wanted to take what he had built and make his own non profit since he had done so much more than what Help Portrait initiates. But he didn't have the time or energy to really do it in the end, but he was burning out with the events. So I confided in him that I was actually wanting to start a non profit for this cause.

And now he's trusted me to take on the foundation that he's built. We met some more, and with encouragement, I started the paper work for applying to become a non profit.  It all happened so fast! I got three people to be on the board of directors, Chris being one of them! I got accepted into a law clinic at the BYU law school and got help making our bylaws and technical confusing law things like that. We had an official board meeting. My good friend Adrian donated her time and talents to making us the awesome logo that you see at the beginning of this post. And next thing we knew, we were accepted as a 501(c)(3) meaning we are a federal tax exempt non profit!

We already had our first event this last weekend. We partnered with the Paiute Tribe down in Cedar City (partnering with others is key to this) and the photographers were myself, Chris, and poor Buck who had never done anything quite like that! We had a good turn out of families and it was a success! 

We have a few more events in the works and a lady from Utah Health Choice, who has supported Chris and the events from the past, is now supporting us and she has a list of people she wants us to partner with. My plan is to one day take this international as well, first stop: Armenia. :)

I still don't know where this journey will take us, how big or little this will be, or how long I'll be in it. I knew from the beginning that I don't want this to take over my job as a stay at home mom, which is truly most important to me. I don't want to lose our outings and long days playing in the yard. So far I've had to wake up early, go to bed late, and take nap time as my work times. I also dream of this being a family thing, a part of our girls lives; that they will grow up serving in the events and helping other people in the community and world. 

I am SO grateful to God, who is a loving Heavenly Father, who has plans for us all to fulfill our dreams if we will just have faith and take it one step at a time. I know He is real and has directed my path! And I get all weepy just thinking about it. He has shown me that trusting Him is the only way to live.

I am beyond grateful for my Buck. I can't EVEN begin to tell you how wonderful he is and has been through this all. He is an equal partner with me in being a parent. Just because I'm the one who stays home, he doesn't see me as therefore the one who has to do it all. And that makes me feel like I am equal parts "mom" "wife" and "Anna." He supports me in all of those. He lets me buy expensive photo equipment. He helps at the events AND sets up and takes down all of the stuff! He stays up late making websites for me. He lets me talk things out. He encourages me. It hasn't all been easy, we've really had to work through some things as our marriage grows and I take on new things. But he has been there for me and ready to communicate. I would have been lost without him, in every way. 

So now that you know the story, I will keep this updated with our events and you can join this journey with us! :)