I also keep planning all these epic things like Sunday canyon drives, weekend pow-wow and Navajo fairs, Zion National Park escapes, pancakes for breakfast, morning walks, ghost towns, corn mazes, volunteer work, starting a singing group, going to a pumpkin patch and apple cider mill, and maybe taking some people's pictures. But do these things happen?
No.
Because I have been feeling like a pile. And as each of these things pass away and become lost opportunities I feel more and more like a flower without a scent and therefore I keep laying at home.
Mostly because I don't have a job and all my friends here have jobs and/or school during the days. They are incredibly productive people. Unlike someone I know...
Don't get me wrong. I'm not sad. Because really, my life, as in my life- {his name being Buck} is the best life I could ask for. Which is why I just want to contribute.
But until God sees fit I guess that I will take care of this little monster:
Yes. Those are my socks. It's amazing the things he finds and knights as toys. He is sleeping next to me right now though. I sure do love him. My little punkin. He's growing up!
The point is... that I don't know what my point is.
Life is always so bizarre. And so are cats.
Life is always so bizarre. And so are cats.
6 comments:
amen sister. i feel exactly the same way. when you figure it out, let me know. cuz i can only cook and read and clean and watch gilmore girls and practice the piano for so long.
Wait. Isn't taking care of Miso a full-time job? It sure looks like it... ;-)
sometimes you go through limbos in life. something will happen if you keep trying.
THIS POST = MY LIFE!!!
The situation is different, but I have been feeling exactly the same way. It's kinda helped to be going to school again, but something about getting married forces you to re-examine everything, and you end up losing all the answers you thought you had.
So far, I'm back to "The Church is true," "Lift those up around you," and "Get good grades."
Which works for now.
(Also, the fact that the one time we had an awesome adventure and went on a road-trip to Oregon, the car broke down and we spent an additional 3 days and $900 trying to get home, doesn't help my husband be "pro-adventure" at the moment.)
Anyway, I believe in both of us. That's my point.
I hope you find something soon. I'm thinking...and I honestly don't think I've ever had a time in my life where I didn't have a million things to do!! I sometimes wish I had less to do, but if things slowed down too much, I'd hate it! Just like you do. I know I would. Hang in there!
I think we are telepathic or something, because I've been feeling the EXACT same way! Did you see my 'sigh' post??? You said everything in your post that I didn't say in mine, but was feeling and thinking it. I have applied and interviewed to so many places and it seems as though nothing and no one wants little old me. I do have a job, and I'm grateful, don't get me wrong, but it is a ridiculous place and a rotten environment for myself, and let's face it, I just need out of there. I feel so lazy. So un-creative and it breaks my heart. I feel no desires or motivations. Fat. Useless. I'm in such a boring routine all I feel I do is eat, sleep, work. Yuck. I just need out of this rut! Fried, I think you are great and we will find a way to get out of this hole! :)
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